so today has been a rollercoater ride for me. at first i was like really nervous, because i had a science final today, then i was happy, because i was done the exam and i found out that i could go to briannes wedding shower, then i got sad, because well of a reason you dont need to know. and now i dont know whether i want to go to her shower or not. i would rather get wasted out of my mind. i dont want to remember much these days. my mom and manwhore got in a arguement im going to call it. and my mom isnt telling me anything about what they said. like fuck. im so frustrated right now. i dont even know if i want to go to her wedding. ugh. i wish i could just escape. i could use a drink or 4 right now. and to boot, my uncle is going to convince me to go to my mom's wedding. i dont give a shit what anyone says, i am not going. "i dont know what kind of girl i am." i want to go somewhere for a while. oh well you look at that. there's the party next weekend. and the only fucking reason i am even going in the first place is because my one cousin cant go. and its only supposed to be '18+'. so im going to be such an outcast. i mean, i will have my cousin there with me, but i mean, shes not going to be with me all the time. and im not that much of a 'social butterfly'. ugh. and i dont want to go out and buy something to wear to this event. fuck. i dont know what to do. ugh. dear lord, help me. entirely.
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